Anna Beddoes to Davies Giddy, 28-October-4 November 1803
It is two O’clock in the afternoon, I am just waked from a little nap, with Rasselas [1] and your letter on my lap – how is it possible with the wish I told you I had to improve myself, that I could fall asleep – either the desire for improvement is not strong enough to overcome my indolence, & consequently I shall always be what I am, or it is a temporary inability from want of habitual industry, which time and practice may overcome. The fact is, as I tell you, I do my utmost to attend to what I wish to learn and after a little time can keep my eyes open no longer – you cannot think how this disheartens me – what shall I do! Shall I become a Fakear [2] and remain in one position from this time to the end of my existence, I believe I shall, for this is alas too favourite a manner of passing my time, and probably as few ideas pass through my mind as those of the poor Indian. These thoughts however are so pleasing to me that I have no objection to become a Fakear.
How beautifully Rasselas is written, I heard it read aloud, at a time when I was not capable of judging of its merits, for it was some years before I was married – and the impression it left on my mind was unpleasant, it made me melancholy, which I did not like, and as my father and sister, despised and laughed at the book, I had a confused idea that it was something very absurd – It is beautiful, it is indeed melancholy, and it is true – but I have not yet read it half through. – This is a pleasure, a most delightful pleasure to come, I know who the second chapter puts me in mind of – I happened to open on the [<word illeg. >] that which you desired me to apply – a very fair, and a very unfortunate lady appeared before me – am I right? Sometimes when I reflect upon what I know of you, I think you sincere, and not given to lying – I think again, and find you full of duplicity – do not take this perfectly in earnest nine tenths of it is joke – whether you are false or true, I know I would trust you where I should put many folds of caution to hide myself from another. By the bye I must not forget to tell you that my Father has sent at two different times above three hundred pounds to Lovell [3] which he has never received, many letters have met the same fate – what can be the reason of this! Mr. Hare [4] (Fox’s [5] friend) writes very differently of the treatment he and some of his Countrymen received last July - he says the writer of that letter (meaning my brother) must have incurred the displeasure or suspicion of the French Government or he would scarcely have undergone a treatment so different from the rest of his Countrymen – and he adds ‘you will I think on all accounts be pleased to hear that (whatever cruelties the English may be exposed to hereafter) they have not as yet reason to complain of any except that honourable one of being detained as prisoners of war’. This is extracted from a letter or rather letterkin that Dr Beddoes received a few days ago –
It is now a week since this was written – I do not think I will send it – I shall only tire you with my follies – Hope long deferred you know – and so it is – For some days past I have got up in the morning with the pleasing expectation of the evening’s bringing me a letter from Tredrea and I went to rest with a greater certainty that tomorrow would be more propitious – but so many tomorrows have passed that I have grown sulky – Is not it strange to be so impatient of others silence, when I am apt to be so mute myself! Mary [6] is very good but she would be still better if she would send me a letter.
These lines pleased me very much, they are by a modern poet who is much abused and much admired [7] and perhaps the censure & applause are equally unjust.
A Reflection at Sea
See how, beneath the moonbeam’s smile
Yon little billow heaves its breast
And foams & sparkles for a while
And murmuring then subsides to rest.
Thus man, the sport of bliss and care;
Rises on Time’s eventful sea;
And having swell’d a moment there,
Thus melts into Eternity! [8]
I shall certainly have my Greek lesson for my master, [9] but the pronouncing will be something in the manner of a certain friend of mine who reads French a la merveille. [10]
Many people here are frightened at the invasion; [11] when poor creatures have suffered so much from fear already that their feelings will be extinct when most wanted.
And now having written you what you will call a very long letter, I will wish you a long good night, that is that you may not sit up late for it is very bad for you, but I forget, when you read this it will be nearer good morning than good night – however do not sit up unreasonably late; if you cannot be satisfied without ideas to [word missing] and wrestle with; go to sleep and fancy will soon load you with her heterogeneous stores which you can puzzle about, to just as much advantage (begging your pardon) as if her sister Reason with all her pomposity regularity & selection stood straining your understanding till.., till till – good night, – I had better go, for all my understanding seems to be exhausted. – Love to all – Surely tomorrow I shall have a letter!
Tomorrow is passed – and now I have a letter – good creature – Remember – remember the middle of November. [12]
Your sister will be very unkind if she won’t write without franking. I am sorry this cannot be done for you. [13]
I hope this will find you getting stronger and stronger. Tell me what you think of Doctor’s Pamphlets. [14]
Address: Davies Giddy Esq / Tredrea / Marazion / Cornwall
Endorsement: 1803 / Novr the 4th
Notes
[1] Anna and Giddy had been exchanging references to Samuel Johnson’s story: see 1 July 1801, note 6.
[2] A Hindu sadhu.
[3] Anna’s brother Lovell Edgeworth (1775–1842), whom she had helped raise as a boy, had been travelling in France with Thomas Wedgwood (1771–1805) during the Peace of Amiens. When in May 1803 the Peace broke down and Britain detained all French shipping in its ports, Napoleon ordered that all British civilians currently in France should be interned. Nearly 2000 were detained, many not gaining their liberty until 1814.
[4] James Hare (1747–1804), was a member of the circle of Whigs centred on the Duke and Duchess of Devonshire. He was one of Beddoes’s principal advisors over the founding of the Pneumatic Institution.
[5] Charles James Fox (1749–1806), the Whig leader, an admirer of many things French, including the French Revolution, in its early, pre-Terror, stages. Fox had been given VIP treatment in France during the Peace.
[6] Giddy’s sister Mary Philippa.
[7] Thomas Moore (1779–1852), Irish poet, singer, songwriter, and entertainer. He was abused because social conservatives considered his works to have an immoral tendency. These included his 1800 translations of the Greek poet Anacreon and his pseudonymous 1801 collection Poetical Works of the Late Thomas Little Esq. He was admired as a lyricist: his Irish Melodies, first published in 1808, were published with musical scores and were very widely sung.
[8] The poem was published in The Poetical Works of the Late Thomas Little Esq.
[9] Giddy had been keen that Anna learn a language.
[10] In a marvellous – i.e extraordinary – manner.
[11] Napoleon had amassed soldiers and boats in the French ports; an invasion of Britain was imminently expected.
[12] Alluding to the popular Gunpowder Plot chant, ‘Remember, remember, the 5th of November: Gunpowder, treason and plot’, anticipating Giddy’s promised visit to Clifton, which actually took place at the end of November.
[13] Evidently the privilege of posting letters without charge, enjoyed by many who had official posts, did not after all apply to Giddy.
[14] See Giddy's letter of mid-late April 1802, note 5: Beddoes had been publishing A Series of Essays on Health, on a Plan Entirely Popular. Their overall title, when collected, was Hygëia: or Essays Moral and Medical, on the Causes Affecting the Personal State of Our Middling and Affluent Classes, 3 vols (Bristol: printed by J. Mills for R. Phillips, London, 1802–3).