Thomas Beddoes to Thomas Wilkinson, 2 December 1798
2 Dec. 1798.
My dear Sir
Not many days ago I put into Lady A’s hands a paper which I myself consider as of the utmost importance to your two promising little wards.
The character of John is very uncommon; & I think him as capable of going far in good or bad as any human being I have ever beheld. I think the better of him for this capability. We must only take care that his propensity to enthusiasm does not take the turn of debauchery at school and college, or of gambling in after-life.
I will tell you a few of the many facts, from which I conclude he would stick at nothing, if this were to be the case.
When his mother comes from Bath, where she has chiefly been of late, he is absolutely intoxicated. He talks, laughs, acts & cries just like a person in liquor.
The two boys & Maryanne – Mr. Ralph will tell you who she is – play at certain little games with the French master, in order to acquire French words more pleasantly. The other two are cheerful & no more; John is quite delirious – His eyes are on fire – his cheeks flushed & in the paroxysm I have little doubt but he would run against a drawn sword or jump down a precipice.
I once thought him obstinate, but I am quite convinced he is never so, if by obstinacy we mean persisting in a thing because he has begun upon it, & because he is desired to desist, feeling it at the same time to be wrong. When he receives a strong disagreeable impression, it overpowers him & takes possession <of him>, just like one of a contrary kind; & in this state of absorption by his own feelings he has <sometimes> the appearance of being obstinate. –Two or three days ago he went to see a Lady Holte who is here – old & jaundiced. Mrs. B had told him she looked very ill but was very sensible & good-natured. That day she was of a blackish-yellow, & her deshabille did not set her off to any advantage. Notwithstanding the previous information, the moment John beheld her he turned short round & wd not be persuaded to go near her.
Afterwards, Mrs B told him to be sure she looked disagreeably, but she wd be glad to get rid of her yellowness & that by the same rule he himself might die, if nobody would go near him in case he had a disagreeable complaint – He seemed very sensible of all this & next day Lady Holte, happening to stop at my door he went up to her & told her he was sorry he had behaved so ill – If this boy had been abused or beaten as obstinate on this or similar occasions, he wd have become so – & by such treatment continued, wd turn out as malicious a tyrant as any the North of England is blessed with – But a very little conversation will lead him to correct himself. He is reasonable beyond what one cd expect at his age.
To prevent his intense feelings from hurrying him in after life into excesses, ruinous to his health or fortune is the point to be gradually accomplished. I know nothing so capable of counterpoising this enthusiastic turn as a clear insight into things on the principle described in the letter transmitted through Lady Anne. He should also learn a good deal of arithmetic for the same end – I wd not wish the spirit of his character changed.
Both boys are very hearty & very happy – learning their French & every thing else, put to them, rapidly –
I am, Dear Sir
yours with great truth,
Thomas Beddoes.
Thomas Wilkinson, Esq.’
Published: Durham, vol. I, pp. 44–45
MS: Lambton Park MS